nways..really feels good to see family.. hehehe.. really nice.. and the food! ahh.. don't even get me started :P hahahah...
missing everyone back in bham too!
hmm i'd just like to say.. not all of my heart is with me now :( u know..it's like..when trust becomes the issue, u tend to not have it anymore? have u heard? hmm..
apparently my trust has been thrown aside like a piece of trash by people who do not cherish friendship and close-ness. i've put in ALL my heart in trust and sort, but if it has to be this way. then, it just has to be.
putting the blame on someone else wouldn't be good. cause, it IS somewhat my fault. Unlike some people who hate me and not daring to tell me enough, and despite that adding more fabrications to it. i put the blame on me. I happily can say that, yes it was MY fault you said those things. it was ME who didn't get the chance to make you turn back and repent. It was ME who didn't make time to help you out. But it wasn't me who did NOT pray for your health, prosperity and safety. It wasn't me who didn't pray for the great things i wish for them to be. And it wasn't me who didn't try to help in any way possible.
I took them like family. I took them like my own blood. But like the old saying " The master of the body forbids it ". As such, i can't force. no?
Papa said great things to me when i consulted him. Such a great man he is, he told me
" Never make enemies. Even if you don't, there will still be enemies out there for you. "
apart from taking heed of my dad's advice, i then just came to my senses. Who CAN i trust now? After them putting my trust just by the road side. Just put a happy smile and not mean it.
I know the games you play. People know the pieces you've just made. But your queen has just run out of luck. Mate?
Shouldn't it be a matter of self drive?! what happened to the good out there..? what? when did it go away?
i know it's not my place to judge. But it's very sad to think that, they just took u away from responsible trust. I thank Allah for showing me the way now. Better late than never i suppose.
I reckon, apology wont be something that'll be given to me after having to read this. I suppose, i should forgive them then.
Even Allah forgives those who HATES Him. Why shouldn't i? Islam teaches us that, by strengthening your iman, you tend to be protected and get wiser in decision. I suppose, that's what helped me through the experience. And more to come? hmm
Anyways, ill just end this issue of my state of mild depression with just a few words of advice and of sincere from heart.
One:
Never think that you are above everyone, for there's a greater power above you.
Two:
No one is lucky twice.
My sincere apology to the people who has taken my trust and dumped it the way they wanted it.
My most SINCERE sorry to the people, whom i thought was family, blood and relation.
Just for your information, i cried my heart out to Allah to give me the strength, iman and guidance. I cried my heart out in means to see why this has happened.
I cried because i thought they were something precious to me. They were a part of my life, love and heart. But im sorry, i cant cry no more.
May Allah bless us all.
Salam
:')
2 comments:
Welcome home!(though I'm not there...haha)
Seems like you've gone through quite a lot.
hope you'll feel better at home with family and friends to cheer you up.
My advice: you don't have to give a damn of what other people do with your trust, as long as you know there are still people out there who trusts you. Trust in what you believe.
Have a nice day =]
hey rong..thanks =) i have really... some people just dont deserve to be trusted. haih
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